Happy Easter

Well DS is officially out of self isoation.

His gf came up last night. She has a month left of work at her temp job in a law office and then she will be here for good.

DS cleaned the house ahead of her arrival.

The spent the morning shopping and cooking and were coming over here for Easter Dinner

Definitely a quiet one due to Covid. DS2 will stay up with his gf. We aren't sharing space with any other parts of our family, so just the four of us.

DS and gf made springrolls and a dip along with a salad. We did up a ham and the fixings and I made a cheesecake.

It was so good to have people in the house. Laughter. Noises. Watching DS play with his cats. Food cooking.

It was our first Easter celebration in this house. I gave a bit of reflection to mom and dad and all the celebrations we have had in this house. I couldn't think of it too much or it is just too darn hard.

I have to say DS is quite a cook. The springrolls were delicious. He used to be such a picky eater but all his travels with hockey around the world have opened up his palate more.

We watched a movie after supper and had a fire downstairs and then went home.

Our district traditionally does not have school from Good Friday and all of the next week, and the government of SK has decided this will continue forward. So a week off online learning for us.

Mid week

It feels like forever since we started this and really it was only a few days ago. I have started to make mental lists of things I might be able to convert into online learning. I definitely feel like I am neglecting the students.

I did some baking today and dropped two tins of it off at friend's houses on their doorstep. I am not used to being at home and feel like I should be out and doing something.

Watching the toll in Italy grow and the new cases developing in the US is a bit frightening. Lockdowns have begun. Not just self isolation but stay inside.

I have started keeping a list of new cases here in SK and will continue to add as they days go on. We are much more spread out here than probably where many of you are, but it will come.

My routine is still getting up as early as I did for work. Up and coffee and watch the news. Check social media. Then I try to do something productive, but its hard.

DS1 is surviving. He gave me a list of things he was wanting and I dropped them off in the garage. Our buffer zone we call it.

As long as it stays cold  and snowy here, people will be more inclined to stay home. But as soon as it warms up.... yikes.

Weekends

DS phoned close to midnight. They had safely crossed the border. There was actually minimal fuss there with border patrol just handing them pamphlets about Covid and saying they should be doing a 14 day self isolation.

At this point they were exhausted. They wanted to push on. "It's only 7 more hours to home".

I told him to stop. Get a hotel room in the city just across the border. Eat. Shower. Rest.

The boys were complaining about the snow and temps. Poor little beach bums had forgotten what Sask weather in like.  They agreed to stop for the night.

The old house is ready to go. Everything's clean for him and I have stocked it with things he might like. I hope he gets how serious the 14 day self isolation is. And the law. but he's a social butterfly and hasn't seen his gf since early December.

a Lull Day

If I didn't think too hard, it could almost be Easter Break . Friday off, long weekend. No work duties.

I wandered for a good hour this morning, in my own home. I needed to shake it off. Do something. Do anything.

I baked a few batches of cookies and muffins, definitely appreciating my kitchen aid. The smell of baking was calming in a weird way. And I didn't eat a ton of cookie dough. Score!

I looked at my school pile and had to put it in a room to try to forget it for awhile. We weren't sure exactly what we were supposed to do, so give it a few days. A response team was meeting provincially and then would trickle the information down.

DS would call every few hours and update us. He and his buddy took turns driving four hour shifts while the other slept. Their grandiose ideas of stopping and enjoying the drive were out the window. They only stopped for fuel, snacks and a pee break, but each stop things felt a little more like 'this shit is real' as signs started appearing with guidelines for safety.

They are slowly making their way through the 33 hour drive.

Hump Day Happenings

The halls are hauntingly empty.

At our staff meeting this morning they said we are a go until Thursday 3:30. Then, according to the province, we will have Friday, and next week as Pause, as they are calling it. Time to be at home and figure out this new world for our family as well as for teaching.

The govt stated in that initial announcement that online learning is optional and everyone passes.

NOT well thought out to say the least. So many what ifs and our hands are tied. Really wish they would include us in conversations.

I finished my marks and updated my report cards for Term 3. My EA and I began cleaning around the classroom. Wiping desks and computers. Finding library books and returning them. Making lists of students to contact that they had belongings in my room.

We as a staff have planned a nerf gun war for our noon tomorrow. Tensions are high and everyone is shell shocked. We need a bit of levity and togetherness before we say goodbye to each other and the building.

After work, DH and I went for a big grocery shop. Unsure of how this is going to go, we are just making sure we have what we need for at least  couple weeks. The stores were crazy. Jammed. Panicy. Like right before Christmas but more stressful.

Carts are piled high. Shelves are bare. Almost no canned goods. No milk or bread. Surprisingly, the ice-cream bins are empty. This, in addition to the now usual - no cleaning products, flour, TP etc.

We didn't hoard but just made sure we had a few of each item we would want. It was one of the biggest bills I have had grocery shopping. Took forever to put away.

DS phoned tonight. Their league is suspended. He is doing his close out interview tomorrow (Thursday), taking care of his banking, and cleaning their condo.  One of the boys on the team is from SK. He had planned to fly home but was more than a little nervous about it. That, and last minute flights were exorbitantly expensive. DS decided they would come home together. How they will get 2 sets of equipment (the buddy is a goalie), and all their belongings in DS's Jeep Compass, is beyond me.

so much for their big plan of "many of the boys are going to caravan together, stop in Nashville for the night, etc)

DS2 is cleaning up our old house and getting his things ready to clear out before DS1 gets home.

so what do we do from here?

Our big  - hey we are doing sanctions is quite meaningless now.

no students in my room so no need to arrive early. There are still kids in other rooms, especially in 10-12 and technically they can be here til Thursday.


Today I am mostly marking assignments that have come in and getting my marks book up to date.

In other news, DS1 hears tomorrow what is happening with his team.

NHL, AHL and all our Canadian leagues are suspended. It's only a matter of time until DS's league is too.

The Sugar Bowl

It was just a Corelle sugar bowl. From probably the early 90s. Not those old blue ones I see in news articles that are worth thousands of dollars ( I have those too).

Just a little sugar bowl like the picture below.

When we moved to mom and dad's house, or rather, AS we were doing the move, bit by bit last fall, one of the first things I did was bring my dishes over and move mom's over to the other house where DS2 is living now. It was part of my psychology of moving in.

But I didn't touch the sugar bowl.

That bowl sat in the middle of the table for years. It was there when we came to supper with mom and dad. It was there for morning coffee or afternoon tea.  It was what I played in, slowly picking the sugar up with the spoon and letting it fall back into bowl. My own kind of zen garden I guess.

My mom would bug me and tell me to quit playing in the sugar.

My dad spilled it accidentally one day and 'blamed' me. We all had a good laugh over that.

When DS1's girlfriend did one of her first visits over here, she too mindlessly dipped up sugar and let it slide off the spoon. That's when mom knew she was the right one for my son :-)

After mom passed it stayed on the table and was there as my sister and I tried to maintain 'normal' with dad... morning coffee and afternoon tea.

And when he passed it was one of the things in the kitchen I purposely didn't touch.

I've had a tough go mentally. I still have to 'not think' about why I am living here in this house. It's just too hard. I remember what I lost, and I remember finding him here, in the house.

I just appreciate the moments. And though I don't put sugar in my coffee, I do put a little in my tea and it's there, and so are mom and dad.

So today when DH was pulling the plastic cap off the top of the water jug before taking it back to the store to get refilled, the jug bounced.....and  the sugar bowl went flying. Off the table and a big smash.

I heard the 'shit!!' and came running.

I think DH was prepared for a strong emotional moment. I have done that far too many times in the past. A few tears came down my cheeks and I said 'it's ok. It doesn't change the memories'.

I think he was a bit in shock. I restated that it was ok and started to clean it up.

The bowl broke perfectly in half. I mean......perfectly.

I rummaged in the drawer for the little tube of crazy glue dad left behind. I don't touch it. I do not have a good track record for using crazy glue and not getting it on my fingers.

DH glued it back together.  A tiny crack if you look hard enough.

The bowl is back in the middle of the table, ready for tea tomorrow.

I am grateful I handled it as well as I did and that tells me that I am starting to come back to me.

Hello me! It's been a long time.

Settling in

We have been here at the new house since Monday the 9th

We weren't really ready to move but we had to. DS2 had promised the Scouting Service Corps they could hold their winter meeting at our old house. We really should have been out by then but all this illness slowed the whole process down.

On Sunday the 8th we planned to move. I headed over to get a few grocery staples. It felt weird wandering, not really sure what I needed and not a lot of energy to do it.

 We loaded up a couple laundry baskets with some clothes and headed over to try to set a few things up. I was so sick and weak and coughing. I ended up going to the ER and after a 4 hour stay they said I had a second round of pneumonia. Viral, of course, so no meds would work.

I came home to the new house and told DH I just couldn't do it that night. I just needed to be 'home'. We had a supper here then went back to our old house for the night. I crawled into bed and crashed hard.

Monday I didn't end up working the whole day. Just constant coughing and so weak. I came home and spent the afternoon resting and doing a few things like cleaning out the fridge, and a few cupboards, taking what I know DS wouldn't eat.

I had a big panic attack around 4 when DH was due to come home and I knew I was leaving the house for good. Nothing like a big ole panic attack and some crying to make a positive start.

DS brought over the cats and I relaxed as I watched them run from room to room exploring what was almost all new to them furniture ( we are using a lot of what was mom and dad's until we can afford to replace them.

It felt very final to be moving in. The reality that mom and dad are both gone is hitting home.

There are lots of things to still do. It's more than unpacking  - it's a lot of 'this cupboard is where mom always kept the...…"

I have to do it in bits or it's just too overwhelming.

Sunday Funday

Today was a big day at dad's.

He has a row of pine/spruce trees along the fence line and they have needed tending for a long while. Scraggly, low hanging branches that make it tough to see the fence and tough to get to the bit of 'grass' between the trees and the fence.

DH and DS1 came over today to dad's and we cut and cut and cut. The yard has been neglected for two years now and there is a lot to be done. While they did that, I was baking in the house. Dad likes the smell of baking and misses the sounds of having people around the house so it was perfect for him.

He wasn't up to doing a lot but the supervisor chair definitely was well used as he guided the boys. We burned some of the branches while they were cutting to avoiding hauling them to the farm. We had to stop when the firepit was full of ashes.

A nice supper of BBQ burgers and then we headed home.

Slowly his yard is coming together.

Would have been 60

Today was a tough day. It would have been my parents 60th anniversary.  They met at an old country dance. Dad pulled up to the hall and saw this woman through the window of the hall and knew that was the girl he was going to marry. They had some very tough times and raised four daughters and built their own business. Both were the hardest workers I have ever know.

He didn't want to mark the day with anything and so we respected his wishes.