A challenging 2018

I will be honest....2018 is a tough one.

Mom and dad 's health is still quite iffy. We just about lost dad a couple weeks ago so DS took him to ER and they tested him up the wazoo. Couldn't breathe. Exhausted after a couple steps. They didn't really come up with any 'this is why' reasons. They did give him pills for water on his lungs, but those have lowered his blood pressure too much and he's close to passing out.    Mom continues on. She is done her radiation. She's done a couple more biopsies and a bone scan. She has good days and less good days.

My niece had her baby prematurely. They knew ahead of time there were issues so she was in the city with a top team of doctors. Thank goodness because as she went into labour 4 weeks early, she started to hemorrhage. The doctor said they had less than two minutes to get her to the OR or they would have lost them both. Baby is not great. She had to have a surgery for blockages in her intestines. She hasn't been able to pass anything through her intestines and out. She is breathing on her own so that is good. Tests have been sent off to determine genetic issues. We kept this from mom as long as we could to get her through her radiation trips to the city without added stress.

Work has been..... I have no words.  just one. Tragedy.  I won't discuss it on here, but suffice to say there are a whole lot of people putting one foot in front of the other trying to keep moving while we deal with things that are hard to understand.

I come home from work, go take care of mom and dad and make them supper, then come home and just want to collapse. I am literally mentally exhausted.

needless to say I haven't been blogging and WW has taken a sh*t kicking.

First week back

was EXHAUSTING

It's always tough going back to work after the break. Tougher when you are trying to get kids back into a routine after so long without. Tougher yet when you have kids you know have dicey home lives and it takes a few days to get them to trust again.

Along with work mom had four trips into the city that included one radiation mask prep, three sessions of radiation, one liver biopsy and two meetings with oncologists.

Keeping those trips and their drivers organized as well as taking care of dad and making sure he eats and is taking care of his health issues...well that wears a girl out.

Along with that I did some baking, a run to the recycling depot, a trip to the bank and watched some world junior hockey.

I made my first snowflake originated bonus payment on the LOC this week. $100 of my $1500 goal of bonus payments. The snowflakes came from lotto scratchers $10, recycled bottles $15, and $75 hoarded from my first week of jar money. It felt good to get that started.

The weekend seems full of a basket full of to dos but honestly I spent most of today in bed. I  ran out earlier to get the things mom needed at the drug store. I took my vehicle in for an oil change, and then I took dad as he wanted to go grocery shopping. But the rest....in bed either dozing or watching Netflix. I feel.. 'off'. Maybe the flu coming. Maybe just exhaustion and my brain needed to pause.

Hopefully I am more productive tomorrow with the to dos and getting some marking done at school.

5 day week ahead along with 2 nights of extra curricular with school teams.  Mom has two more radiation trips to the city as well as some sort of endoscopy that they are going to try to do here.

Where the money stands

as of January 4th

Debt
Mortgage - $10 720.67
College LOC - $21 093.44

Total Debt - $31 814.11

Savings/Planned Spending
TFSA/EF - $8200 
RRSP -$15 351
Back to School 2018 - $100
XMAS 2018 - $200
TFSA 2018 - $400
RRSP 2018 - $1000
Plates 2018 - $0

Plots, plans and ponderings for 2018

You know, it's funny. Each year about this time I search online for an image that depicts my feelings about the coming year. Some years there are so many that fit my mood, it's hard to choose.

Yesterday I spent over an hour surfing the net and looking for the right one. Not only did I NOT find the right one, I didn't find ANY one that even remotely appealed to me. That gets me to wondering about my focus or lack of focus for the year.

The closest pic that matched my thoughts was what I posted last year:

Someone, more graphically orientated would be able to change it to 2018. That is definitely not in my wheelhouse.

Those are really the kinds of goals that will make me a happier person.



A lot of the money basics are hardwired into me now after almost 10 years of doing this:

1) RRSP - $1500

2) TFSA - $1000
This will come out of the change I roll each month after the Back to School goal has been met. I may have to top things off if I have low or no change months. I already have $400 of it ready to go since I didn't reach this goal in 2017

3) Summer 2018 - $1000
I have no set plans for summer. We did our last family camp last summer and that era is now over. I know DS1 plans to go back to the mountains but I think that is a non parent trip :-)

4) Back to School - $500
This will come out of my change each month from January to August, or earlier if that is how the change works out

5) XMAS - $1500

6) LOC - $1500 Bonus payments
I hope that nothing keeps me from my regular monthly payments on my LOC. I also hope that nothing happens that causes me to have to add to it. Life does its own thing sometimes. Beyond the regular payments I would like to try to get another $1500 in lump sum payments put down on it. This could come from $ not spent from my jar money each week. That would put my LOC balance at about $16 500.   I also have the option after DS is done college to direct some of that college savings money towards the LOC to get it lower yet.  We shall see how things unfold

7) Plates 2018 - $1200
Both boys' vehicle insurance is under my name. DS2 has started paying me $ each month to put towards his so that will save me $1200. DS1..... I have no idea where he will be in the fall. If he moves to the US permanently, we will have to figure out the proper paperwork to have it licensed wherever he ends up. If he ends up in Europe, we will have to figure out a different plan.  I won't know until at least July so there is no point worrying about it. I will save the $ and if  I don't need it, it definitely has other places to go.

8) the House -
I have been told that my parents wish to leave me their house when they are both gone. I very much hope that is a long long time in the future. I also know that the value of the house is more than what my value of their estate would be. Should this unfold in 2018, I will have some $ decisions about what to do and how to fund the balance of the $ to purchase it from the estate.

9) Reading
I have reset up my ABC book list to see if I can be a bit more motivated to read a little more voraciously.

10) Travel
I set aside a little bit of $ each month for travel. I will be headed down to DS1 for his last home game and Senior Parent Night. That will be a flight and hotel cost.

I also would like to go somewhere else this year. It doesn't have to be far. Just so I can live a little bit.

I guess that the most important part of 2018 will to appreciate the moments I have left with mom and dad as well as stay sane and balanced on my own home front as well as at work.  Nothing from the above list works if I am not healthy - mind or body.

Starting things off and wrapping things up

It's been New Year's Day that is a bit familiar and a bit unfamiliar.

First, it was a quiet NY  eve.

I spent a few hours at school yesterday and then several more at mom and dad's. I fed them lunch and mom was in an organizing mood so we had a lot of tough conversations. The Will. Where their accounts are. Her funeral. The funeral card. Those kinds of things have always been very important to her so I had to suck it up and write it all down without tears.

I left them with supper in the crock pot and headed home.

DS1 got back to his home city yesterday afternoon from their tournament on the East Coast. His team won, but even more important, DS did very well. I was very proud of him.  It was good for their team to get home after a few flight delays due to weather.

DS2 headed out about 10 PM to a friend's house for the night. Hopefully his vehicle starts. Mine didn't yesterday and I had to take DH's truck to the school and out. It's been super cold. -40s C PLUS windchill.

Insomnia got me again last night from 3 AM to 7 AM, but I finally crashed and woke up at 10. That is so late for me.

Mom's surgical oncologist phoned today. I know! on NY Day. He called to say that the biopsy of her lymph nodes came back NOT malignant. Excellent news. He wants to do a biopsy of her lungs though.  So starting tomorrow, and until next Wed  the 10th, we have to get mom into the city each day for radiation and her biopsy. That's a lot of organizing with me headed back to work Wed and my other sister gone on a previously scheduled ( and mom approved) trip to Austria.   The other two sisters can't help that way due to medical conditions so we have some organizing to do.

I did a few familiar NY Day things for me. Watched the NHL outdoor classic. Filled in all the dates on my new 2018 mom's calendar. I set my target goals on the main webpage to ZERO and it's a sea of pink as I wait for the goals to be met.

I planned some meals for the next four days to get back into the 'back to work' schedule. They will all be eaten at my parents' house, especially if dad is alone a night or two while mom has the biopsy.

We will head over to their house and make supper tonight.

Beyond that I am hoping for temperature warm ups. My (extended) Christmas break is pretty much over tonight and I will have to find a way to juggle work and caregiving into my schedule.